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Being SELFISH occasionally is IMPORTANT! 
If you don’t take care of your needs… who will? 
If you’re in a relationship and you’re putting your children first… that’s a recipe for a disaster.

As a parent and a foster carer, I have done both the super mum… the fixer of it all… the first person they turn to… and I have put my relationship second and every time I do that… it’s a DISASTER!  Or if I don’t take time out for myself and recharge my batteries… then I end up running out of energy… I get snappy and frustrated.  We all need to put ourselves first occasionally an preferably… regularly!

Self-care adviceSome of the ways you can support yourself…

Parenting is hard sometimes… especially when we are time poor, under stress and feeling overwhelmed and under supported.  It’s normal not to be a perfect parenting… it’s normal to get it wrong occasionally… it’s normal to wonder if you’re getting it right and worrying about your kids.  What is super important in those moments when you’re feeling overwhelmed is to stop and take a moment for yourself.  It’s important that you give yourself a break… literally and emotionally.  Sometimes that can be hard if you don’t have support to give you a break.  However, there are ways you can help calm that inner storm… even in the home with the kids around you.  It takes practice and persistence… but the pay offs are worth it.  Mindfulness is a pathway to a quieter mind and really helpful when you’re feeling angry, frustrated, anxious or overwhelmed.   You don’t need to sit in a chair in complete silence either!  You can do it while you’re washing up, brushing hair or teeth, walking… basically at anytime.  What it requires is practice to bring your awareness into your body, your breath, your senses and to focus on these for at least 5 mins.  By centering and monitoring your senses and breath, you are focusing your attention on the moment and away from the chitter chatter of your mind and emotions.  By doing that… you are giving yourself a break.  Practice will help you bring your attention to the parts of your body that maybe tight, clenched and stiff.  By focusing on your body… you have the opportunity to notice and practice relaxing in the moment.  That is going to flow into all areas of your life!

Those of you caring for children that have come into your home and hearts from other parents… you need support!  Sometimes as a carer you may feel vulnerable going through the agency or government department that oversees your children.  It can be hard to show your struggles and perhaps even harder to get them to help!  Turning to friends and other family may also be challenging as they offer advice you can’t follow or get frustrated due to the red tape, challenging behaviours and overall system.  Let us help you with that.

Our parenting/caring program helps you to become more aware of your emotions and your kids.  When we bring this awareness into the home… we learn how quickly that naming emotions can tame them very quickly!  The biggest way we can support ourselves is to learn these skills and name our own emotions and learn what sets us off!  This will… in the face of any in-home challenge… provide us with the capacity to quickly bring ourselves out of an emotional storm and with that… we can respond in the way that we want… calmly.

Our Peaceful Parenting program combines the understanding of human and child brain development and behaviour with proven parenting skills, Family & Systemic Constellation Theory, mindfulness and Emotional Freedom Techniques for self-care and management of our emotions.

Peaceful parenting Workshops and online programs

What others have to say…

I feel really hopeful – thank you Vanessa and to all the other workshop participants. I think I can move forward now in my life. 🙂 YEAH!!