Explore how to parent differently…
Kids who can’t live with their mum or dad experience significant grief and loss… This is a trauma in itself! This creates behaviours that may look similar to other children, but the basis… the cause… of that behaviour is very different. So how do you manage this?
How can you parent these traumatised children and not lose your cool?
How can I parent when rewards, threats and punishments don’t seem to work?
We teach how to care for kids when there has been trauma in their early experience…
Trauma can happen as early as in the womb and has a spectrum of effects on children depending on their temperament, the extent of the trauma and the impact on their development. Children can often be diagnosed with ADHD, Autism, OCD, ODD and PTSD… but at the basis of all of these diagnosis’ is trauma. To feel in control as their carer you need to be prepared to parent differently…
Caring for Kids…
I am a carer for teens and I have supported, trained and coached carers of all kinds for kids of all ages… so I understand what challenges you face. In addition to this, I can appreciate what it means to be a carer inside the OOHC or Permanency Support Program (PSP) and how this means that you are co-parenting with agency/government staff. I also realise that once carers take the action to move into Guardianship or Adoptions, just how relieving and yet scary that is to move away from the support of the system.
Fundamentally you need good support from people who understand you, don’t judge you, don’t make you feel inadequate and who can give you practical strategies that are helpful and work.
I stepped into the OOHC system in 2016 to become a carer initially, and then I found myself in a job assessing, training and supporting carers. What I learned was that what I had been teaching for the last 15 years was absolutely relevant for carers! The Peaceful Parenting learning, steps, the approach, the strategies work! Why? Because they are based in relational strategies… meaning they build the relationship (attachment) and naturally help carers connect before redirecting the behaviour for the child. Peaceful Parenting combines the understanding of human and child brain development and behaviour with proven parenting skills, Family & Systemic Constellation Theory and Emotional Freedom Techniques for self healing and management of your/their triggered emotions.
In our program we help you learn how to parent peacefully even in the most challenging moments such as parent/child, child/child conflict. We teach you the art of negotiating in the face of strong emotions and when you’re stuck in the middle of frustrated family members. We look at the whole family, the extended family and not just the child in your care. You are a family after all! AND… These techniques work with birth family, caseworkers and well meaning friends and family (who express doubts and well meaning concerns). We’ll also help you take your ability to return to peace quickly, in your house in within yourself, to a new level.
We offer our program in two ways:
If you can’t access a face to face workshop due to distance or because you can’t get child minding, that you have the same opportunity to learn these carer, parenting and family transformational skills. We’ve made our Peaceful Parenting program into a 9 module online course which take you through the complete program and connects you with our like minded parenting tribe through forums and online group sessions. You can work through the Peaceful Parenting program at your own pace as we’ve spread it out over 9 modules to help you manage juggling your family life and also get plenty of support and practice for integrating these new skills.
Our face to face workshops offer great a great learning experiences as they allow you to learn in an environment with other carers that are also experiencing similar challenges to you. As you are in a group environment, away from agency staff, you benefit from learning as others are practicing and asking questions, through group and paired exercises and by feeling safe and supported in the shared group experience.
The journey to become a foster carer is different for everyone. Some of us are drawn to open our homes to kids in need while others are elisted through a family connection or by knowing the child/ren personally. What we do know is those who are relative or kinship carers often feel afraid to ask for help for fear of being judged by their agency… there is a fear that they will watch you more closely… question you more. I understand that your privacy and confidentiality is important. When you connect to me directly, your privacy will be protected and we will sign a confidentiality agreement. This will help you feel more able to be honest and ask for the help you need. I want you to feel…
- confident in your ability to care for your kids
- manage any feelings of overwhelmed over the responsibility of caring
- identified when you feel vulnerable and exposed and learn how to manage that
- feel capable of coping with their grief, loss, anger, fear or anxiety
- manage the frustration of co-parenting with the OOHC system
- feel supported to learn what causes your child/ren’s behaviours and how to manage these
Private sessions can transform your emotional climate so you have greater control over your response and capacity to deal with the challenges.